5 comments on “Who Loves a Narcissist?

  1. Thank you for putting it all out there in clear, concise, black & white. I find it hard to believe how blind I was for years! I’m 45 and finally figured out why I’ve spent my life depressed, anxious, and living a “less than” experience. This essay hit home for me, because I remember being little and telling my N-father, “I love you, Daddy!” to receive the craziest response. I was given permission. His answer was usually, “You may.” WTF? Thankfully I married a loving normal man who would actually get upset with me for NOT voicing opinions or taking care of myself.

    Thanks for responding on Sweet Violet’s blog, since that’s how I found you!

    M

    • I’m sorry that you grew up with a narcissistic father. I feel for anyone that had to survive a childhood with a narcissist. No one understands unless they’ve been there AND admitted to it. I think for most people, they are still in denial about how dysfunctional their childhood truly was and, like you said, are full of anxiety and depressed from carrying around their suppressed childhood emotions.

      I’m truly humbled that you find my thoughts helpful. Having others who find themselves in a similar plight find my thoughts and experiences helpful is a definite positive outcome of my life’s experiences.

      It is hard to believe that I was blind for so long, too. I have found that being able to forgive myself for my mistakes and taking the good from my experiences and making peace with the bad is very helpful. I know how hard it is to forgive yourself, because you never receive true forgiveness when you deal with a narcissist, but it can be done.

      I am happy for you that you found a loving normal man who truly cares about you to be your life partner and did not repeat your dance with the narcissist in your adult relationships. That’s certainly a positive!

      Stephen Bach

  2. Pingback: More on Narcissitic Love | The Narcissist's Son

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